1. Fall asleep thinking about characters and plots, but be too lazy to find a pen and paper and scribble it down because you’re just about to go to sleep. Wake up the next morning and forget about it, and have it haunt you all day.
2. Ease drop on other people’s conversations to get novel research.
3. Keep notebooks with tons of random facts in them. If you’re ever murdered and the police go through your stuff they will think you were crazy. Then someone will tell them you were a writer. OH.
4. smile randomly in public because you’ve just figured out your plot hole!
5. Jump around the house and dance because you’ve finished your first draft! OMG It’s done!
7. Stare at the computer from across the room, and then never get up.
8. try to flatten dog-eared page in library books.
9. Look at baby names sites for hours and not be pregnant.
10. Keep checking your word count. No. No, it hasn’t changed
11. Write a sentence. back space. repeat.
12. Kill people frequently… fictional people of course! … O.o
13.Embrace imaginary friends.
14. Space out. A LOT.
15. Let coffee/tea/soup/and food in general go cold if you take it to your desk. The computer is enough to fill anyone up. Not realize it and thirty minutes later take a sip…. ICK!
16. Miss major events in the world. Oh there an African-American president? Oh a guy just shot up the batman movie? Sorry! I was in a writing comma.
17. Yell at inanimate objects. Books, computers, imaginary people in your head.
19. Talk about writing to anyone who will listen. If they don’t who cares! Go on to forcibly tie them to a chair and tell them about writing anyway.
20. Not write, make a blog post instead. Like this one.