Why My Writing Sucks and Other Obvious Truths Explained

16 Jan

Today is one of those days. My words do not like me, my muse has been putting roofies in my drink like a crazed ex-boyfriend, and my characters are about ready to take me out with that shiny new plasma gun they got in chapter 15 because I can’t hear them. My writing sucks today.

I have no idea where all these slush pile pages are going and quite frankly I don’t care.

I know I should be beating up my inner critique right now but sadly she and my characters are sharing the plasma gun today so yeah… I don’t stand much chance.

You see today started out so well, I woke up ate a brownie for breakfast, which as you know always makes me want to write, and then sat down at the computer and typed up my next scene and suddenly….

BAM!

Me: WHAT THE HECK! DID I JUST WASTE MY TIME WRITING THIS??!!!! This is crap, crap I tell you! This makes no sense, Violet would not say this! There is no way this would happen, but crap this has to happen to move onto my next major plot point! ERRRRRR

Muse: HA! I will smite you all mighty smiter with this Plasma gun MWA HA HA HA!!! You have been using me far too much!

Violet (My main character): What is wrong with you Alex I am not saying that. This definitely did not happen * looks over my shoulder at computer screen* wow you disgust me, and by the way I am not going to kiss Jett! Uh you suck * Kicks computer tower with combat boots and walks away*

Me: Sorry, sorry, gosh what do you want from me!

Muse: Your Life. HEHE

Violet: * yells from across the room: * some semblance of what actually happened written down!  

Me: Listen Muse if you don’t kill me I’ll quit today, and Violet… well your story = your problem

Violet: You’re the writer stupid!

Muse: Okay fine. But Alex, I can’t believe your actually having a conversation with people in your head. Freak.

Me: Yeah I know.

So, yeah you could say that I suck at writing, actually that would be pretty accurate. * SIGH * I have got to figure this next scene out or its all going to crash and burn… I would take the dog for a walk and clear my head but its 16 degrees out!

So thank you Muse for trying to kill me and my novel, and thank you world for cursing me by making me live in a state where it is 16 degrees out so I can not walk my dog!

Sorry about this rant but I needed it, now I guess I will go walk my dog in the 16 degree weather and try to figure this out!

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One Response to “Why My Writing Sucks and Other Obvious Truths Explained”

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. Update: My Mental Breakdown and Such « Novel Ideas Life of a Teen Writer - January 20, 2011

    […] First off I’d just like to apologize for my psychotic rant I had a few days ago, I am totally over that and have made a temporary patch for the little problem I had. At least until editing. If you were not here to witness this outburst of writer’s insanity you can see it HERE. […]

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